The two of us live in different locations: Grandchic-the-elder lives on the Gulf Coast, Grandchic-the-younger lives mid-state. Makes for a good mix of "environmental awareness" sometimes!
Grandchic-the-elder: living on the beautiful tropical Gulf Coast has many pros and a few cons. Of course our surroundings are breathtaking, the gardening opportunities un-surpassed, and the sunsets on the beach..well, only God can paint the sky like that! People are in general "live and let live", of course, with a few exceptions, just like anywhere else. Translation: not much ATTITUDE, friendly-like! We live in a military town, which has its positives. It's very artsy-fartsy here, with colorful architecture and seabreezes thrown in for good measure. Kid-friendly, retiree-friendly, family oriented in general.
On the "con" side..
we do have gnats, industrial strength roaches, humidity (of course humidity is a mixed bag--it can keep wrinkles well away from the skin) and get the occasional truly epic weather event. The last time for the latter, of course, was August of 05. The news pictures from the recent worldwide earthquakes and tsunamis look eerily similar to the katrina landscape, so we can so empathize with what those folks are living through now, and will continue to for some time. It changes you, that's for sure.
In my opinion, it's not a productive idea to "waste a crisis". Since you've lived through it, you may as well learn something positive within those circumstances. One of the most valuable lessons I learned was to grieve as you go. Sound crazy? OK, but most of my six decades, I have chosen to work my way through trying situations, of which I've had the usual number.
For instance, my drug of choice for coping has usually been to first: intercede in prayer, then ignore the situation as much as I was able by concentrating on helping somebody else. Step 2: get lost in a good book, have some frantic fun, and/or clean or organize something--you know, MOVE ON with life--not get stuck in it. Then throw my helping profession of nursing into the mix--now there's a good excuse for "not" coping personally--because you have to take care of everyone else! Worked for me, and many times I just put the mental trauma into a convenient file 13. (a common defense mechanism for caregivers of all persuasions!)
That's how I handled my sister's death from cancer. For the several years she fought it, I fought it right along with her; I was a caretaking queen, organized travailing prayer for her, mastering care, research, coordinating all of it in a highly professional manner (you know, the balancing-all-the-plates-in-the-air thing). But the one thing I did not do was grieve it myself in a healthy way. I put it off, staying busy doing essential things to help. I did all I could to save her, but in the end, it was her time to go. So, God had an interesting lesson to teach me. I can remember thinking "If I ever start crying, I may never stop", as I gritted my teeth and refused that process. Of course, looking back, that was the accumulation of a LOT of traumatic events that I had approached that way, I'm sure many left over from childhood.
But God..He had other plans for me. I mean, you would think that now, in my 6th decade, I would have a semi-good handle on grieving things correctly. However, He loves me so much that He won't let me stay in fantasyland--not even when I revert to using that mercy gift He gave me for "others"! Interestingly enough, He also intends for me to use that mercy on myself. What a concept! Wow, if only I could have grasped that when I was Grandchic-the-younger's age..how much more effective my life may have been, and how much more useful I could have been in God's kingdom.
I find a striking similarity between how I previously handled trauma and the phenomenon of PTSD--post-traumatic stress disorder. Common in combat soldiers, and in those who have lived through traumatic events of all kinds: from epic weather events to personal and family challenges. I am so thankful to God that He showed me how to "grieve as I go" after katrina. I can remember specifically asking Him to show me how, when I knew our home had been flooded. He did. And I have to say it was a totally new sensation for me.
Instead of frantic activity (based on a suck-it-up, grin and bear it mindset), He carefully taught me to LOOK at the truth around me, accept it for what it was (no more, no less) and PROCESS it, every day, until the process of processing was finished. (I love that term..the process of processing!) And you know..there DOES come an end to it, and it is true that "this, too, shall pass". But NOT if we do not allow ourselves to process. And it IS work to do that. And it IS an intentional choice we have to make to do it. Otherwise, we can get stuck in the time-warp of the never-ending saga of unresolved emotional baggage, which can get inordinately heavy and cumbersome as we go along in life, and cause us to become unbalanced enough dragging it around, to sometimes even repeat the unhealthy process, over and over again.
Just as the news pictures in Japan depict (and as it was also post-katrina), sometimes EVERYONE else is also traumatized, so the field of those who can help you through the processing, may be very limited.
Now, my process, being of the feminine persuasion, is to verbalize what I am thinking (no matter how irrational it may sound at the time)--since I have an analytical mindset, the rational WILL come, but sometimes it has to wait until all the thoughts are allowed to come in their own particular order! And what will stop up this processing faster than a speeding bullet is for someone to try to tell me the "answer" before I am ready to verbalize it myself. (and of course, we have all done that to others, haven't we??)
Processing to ambush PTSD, can take several forms for me, depending on the availability of those I trust at the time, and in whom I have a confidence in their maturity level to hear it, especially since I am a highly sensitive person (more on that subject in another post, another time!)! If there is no one available on my extremely short list of real live process partners, then I can revert to the written word: the wonderful art of journaling. Basically, for me, this takes on a very strategically aimed intimate and intentional time with the Lord, since I write TO Him. He is always so faithful to bring me back to HIS truth, and shows me time and again, how very alive the words He wrote to me in the Bible are, covering any possible events that I have to live through. Communication, from me to Him, and then Him right back to me, is complete. I so love Him for that fatherly care of me!
Nope..PTSD is not God's will for me. Too much waiting to be done in the Kingdom to get bogged down in the inability (or the unwillingness) to process. It's just another way the enemy tries to deceive us, and I (at my advanced age LOL..) will no longer fall for it.
Now you get a smiley-face for reading my un-amusing musing..all the way to the end!
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